This series has really "gone to the dogs"
For anyone that has been following me since the start of this blog, chances are you know about Pup Star. The children's movie franchise I love to hate. If you're new here you can catch up with my Pup Star, and Pup Star: Better 2Gether reviews.The plot follows Tiny as she becomes a first-time judge for the titular Pup Star competition. This time though instead of staying within the United State, Pup Star is going international to find their first ever global champion. Although of course Bark is up to his old tricks again, how will our pint-sized hero stop him this time? Spoiler alert she does almost nothing in this movie.
The movie begins with a animated music video of a song sung by Tiny about singing across the world. We then transition to the Jimmy Kibble show, cause it's funny the second time? It is revealed that not only will Tiny be joining the panel of judges, but for the first time ever, Pup Star is going international. We also meet the families of the other judges, Simon Growl's Dad who of course is in a pub (or do they call it a "Pug" in this universe?), Dog Gnarly's kids who just seem to hang out at school or something like that, and Lady Pawpaw's narcissistic mother from Jersey. Feel free to forget about these characters as they do basically nothing in this movie. We also meet Scrappy, and P.U.P again, having opened his own recording studio. However things won't be that easy as Bark is back. Despite he, and his human partner Roland being arrested at the end of the second movie, they somehow gained control of the prison they were locked up in. When the dog judges begin to board their plane Tiny, and Lou's Dad surprises them by letting Lou go with Tiny. Although um, i'm pretty sure she can't just join at the last minute, cause you know visas, passports, and did she even have her luggage checked? With Lou joining them, the pack flies off to their first destination, India. Here we meet a dog whose name I can't be bothered to remember his name. He has a thick Indian accent, but is able to sound like as if English is his first language when he sings. Simon Growl ends up giving the Indian dog the Golden Bone, so um, they're not even going to listen to the other dogs, or did only one dog show up to this? The next destination is somewhere in South Africa where Dog Gnarly gives his Golden Bone to this dog that sang something about the... Savannah? I can't recall any of the songs, or new names from this mess. Actually the only dog I remember is Ming, from China who Lady Pawpaw gives her Golden Bone to. I mainly remember her because her head is tilted during the entire movie, like what is wrong with that poor dog? Another reason is because of the incredibly insensitive joke they did. Let me set the scene, the group is out having dinner with Ming, and she orders some local cuisine. The waitress then comes to the table with bowls of soup, and what looks like eyeballs in the soup. Good job Disney on that oh so clever "Hurr durr, Chinese people eat everything" joke. Alright, I need to calm down now.
The final country they visit is Mexico where we find out from a separate scene featuring the Nanny, Ida that her favorite Telenovela actor Julio will be trying out for Pup Star. Let me just say now, that it is straight up creepy how obsessed this human woman is with this dog actor. Julio like anyone else on actual reality television comes up with a huge, sad story to earn him empathy with the judges. He then does his singing, and since because no other dogs came to the competition or something, Tiny gives him the Golden Bone. Julio then insists that he stay with Tiny, and Lou at their Chicago home before the finale. Tiny reluctantly agrees, and so Julio goes home with them. Now the way Ida behaves towards this dog sometimes gets oddly... sexual. Like I get it, dogs can talk now, which means they can give consent, which means... holy shit... is bestiality canon in the Pup Star universe? I, um, much rather not think of that right now, let's get back on topic, okay? Julio is making life an absolute hell for his human hosts, and Tiny. Julio going with Bark's plan kisses Tiny in public, tricking P.U.P into thinking that she doesn't love him anymore. This stunt also gets Tiny's manager fired. Meanwhile while all of this is happening, all those family members I mentioned before have been dognapped by Bark, and his henchdog, and man. The second part of Bark's plan is to hold the judges' families hostage, so then they have no choice, but to make Julio (Technically Bark) the new Pup Star Champion. Back at home Lou catches a video of Julio singing terribly in the shower proving that he has been lip-syncing the whole time. Though Lou won't share this information with Tiny until towards the end of the movie.
Scrappy is the last dog to be dognapped, but P.U.P is able to break into the jail, and free everyone. How? By winning... a rap battle. Like, what? Meanwhile at the Pup Star finale, Tiny's manager is able to find the recording booth that Bark is in, but before he can tell anyone, he is captured. Lou finds Bark, and tries to tell Tiny about his plan, but he decides to reveal himself instead. Tiny, and the judges are not allowed to do anything because they think that their family members are still trapped. During Julio's solo performance P.U.P arrives, and stops Julio showing everyone that he is a fraud. Tiny, and the judges also learn that all their family members are safe now. Although given the crazy circumstances the producers have to cancel choosing a champion this year. They just can't wait until next week, or something? Tiny reassures everyone though that it doesn't matter who the champion is, the only thing that matters is singing for the whole world, and what could be better then that? Says the dog who won two years in a row. With the group all singing the song from the very beginning of the movie, this garbage fire finally ends.
How is it even possible for this movie to be worse then the previous two combined? If it were possible I would give this movie a -5 out of 5 Paws up. Although since I don't do negative scoring, the best thing I can do is give this a 1 out of 5 Paws up. If you have young children, and Netflix there are hundreds of better movies, and shows to put on for your child then this trilogy.
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